if only i could text you this smell
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
