i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
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