Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
This is the high leading the old right now
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
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