Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Dick very happy bro
The Olympian is in my bed
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
