so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
