Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
