So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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