If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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