I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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