I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
