my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
