i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
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