So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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