Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
