Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize
