Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Randomize
