considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
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Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
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I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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