Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
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