did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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