If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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