Cold hands, warm shart.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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