Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize