Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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