Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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