Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
