what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
