i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Randomize
