Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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