Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
Pick me up at 9.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.