I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
