He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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