did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
It's official drugs can't kill me
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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