Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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