i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
