you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
