Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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