spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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