doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I can't put those talents on a resume
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
