He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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