i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow