We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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