There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
