Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
