I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
