wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Can I color on your dick again?
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
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