i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
