Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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