found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
sex in a hospital.. check
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
