She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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