11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
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