wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
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