Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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